I'm not affectionate

I found myself treading new territory once again today. On my way back home I saw the moon, this time looking much larger than normal, still following my every move as though I needed a friend to occupy my time in my uber driver's silence. As I ride the backseat I thought about some of the people I've been with in this life. I wondered if I gave them the impression that I was passionate, affectionate or loving at all. I'm sure I did. If I assessed most of my actions I'm sure I did give that 'I seek love' impression despite constantly being quite vocal about my lack of interest in the obvious. Disappointing tbh. I find that's the world we live in though, you can keep it 100 with someone but they either take your word as gospel or completely dismiss it and pursue whatever fantasy their minds has carelessly conjured up. I guess I'm to blame mostly or am I?

We live in the 21st century, there's films, series, skits, memes, youtubers and blah blah blah, repeatedly showing real life stories about being played or being observant to red flags and I guess if we choose to ignore the many warnings then we should take responsibility for the harm we cause ourselves right? Same goes for the player or unaffectionate or casual seeking party walking around collecting hearts and adding it to their collection. It may not seem like it but all parties has their cross to bear, it's just some feel that weight quicker than others and choose to openly express such a burden and others Reynold wrap that bitch up to deal with it later. I've been told I'm cold numerous times; the thing about being cold is, you tend to go numb and comments that's supposed to sting are not felt so I suggest when you come across a player or someone completely unaffectionate just run the other way, don't intend to change them or waste time hoping someday they acknowledge you're an exception not the rule. The weight on your shoulders will keep feeling significantly heavier if you don't cut that anchor loose.

I refer to the romantic state of our society as 'The ln betweeners' because I've noticed a lot of people still have romantic outings with their exs, whilst others wait to be claimed by someone they've been on many dates with or someone who they've been on and off with for years, others wait for their partner's intentions to match theirs, all the while knowing in their hearts it never will. Just a lot of people stuck in between dumb and full blown bullshit yet somehow they tend to play blind and hopeful. If you're one of these individuals then my deepest sympathies and good luck. I don't want you to think for a second I don't believe in true love, I do, and I think if that's what you seek then dip when you start seeing red flag and find the joy you really desire elsewhere. Waiting around for someone else to bring you joy only leads to heartbreak hotel in my opinion - and guess who pays to stay in that room of misery. I admire those that want to be a victim of Cupid, I think it's 'cute'. I on the other hand have a restraining order on the fool so I think for now I'm good. In conclusion, I guess what I'm trying say is if I'm your next victim, DREAM ON, stay far and run the other way like Cupid. I'm not affectionate - at all and same goes for these players you're praying and hoping would one day feel the same as you. LET THEM GO! LET US GO! MOVE ON!