The other night I was cruising down the street and I found myself staring at these train tracks a few yards away, and suddenly this eerie feel of death being on the loose flooded my spirit. I felt like death was wandering around, with absolutely no malicious intent, ironically they were just admiring life's beautiful perks. Then I wondered to myself, we all have a story right, well what's death story? Is it a he or she? Are they one omnipotent entity or multiple entities switching shifts as we do in our line of work to do the unbearable? Was this always their dream job, inherited business or have they been forced to take on this responsibility? Is this something they've been sentenced to do for eternity or in a strange way is this their attempt at penitence? Do they feel any remorse about taking lives or have they become accustomed to it like we tend to do with our daily routines, job duties and so forth? Do they remember what it was like taking their first life or their first ten lives? Did that feeling bring them joy or sorrow? Do they feel as though they desperately need a career change? Are they offended by the things us humans say about them, neglecting that this is their job and not the crazy actions of a psycho hungry for chaos or obsessed with causing grief? Do they wish to communicate and tell their story?
In a lot of the neighbourhoods I grew up in the consensus concluded death was an enemy - I always felt different, I always thought life is the enemy. How could something that starts off joyous, innocent and hopeful push you to the brink of mental instability, suicide, self loathing, etc and yet demands you still fight for its existence, presence or source, be considered good or prescious. Life fails to sound like an ally to me. I always thought death is life's alter ego, a personality that surfaces when life suffers an episode or mood swings, something along those lines. The irony of this all is this blog surrounds the idea of if life could speak but yet here we are hoping he or she would do just that. I think like life, we all started off good - that also refers to god, the devil, and death; and politians; and tyrants and so forth. But somewhere along the line free will became our greatest ally and enemy in the same breath. See when people hear the story of Adam and Eve they think the devil deserved the blame, some like me even blame god for taking a break from their babysitting duties knowing evil lingered in the vicinity, but the true evil in that story was free will, not an entity at all.
It took writing this to realise, that very night while I was out, maybe death was simply hoping to bask in the acknowledgement of their own free will. We enjoy putting a great deal of blame on the unforseen spectrums wandering around out there but fail to acknowledge that free will is our actual downfall - period. When you chose to drink and drive consequently taking a life, who's to blame? When you chose to quit your last 15 jobs at the first sign of a challenge and now you really require one but cannot seem to get an interview, who's to blame? Or the cigarettes that led to cancer, or the moment you decided to say no to protection and a STD said yes to you, or marry someone that failed to make you feel respected at every turn, or the moment you chose to cross the road without looking both ways... Who's to really blame?
It's time we start taking responsibility for our actions because death, he or she, is inevitable and as a job to do. Similarly, to all of us in society maybe death wishes their workload would remain light at least for today, and maybe like the rest of us they hope we'll simply help each other out, to make the whole "teamwork makes the dream work" concept a reality. What I mean by that is if you see a friend, co-worker, family member or whoever going down a destructive path or developing a bad habit e.g. driving without securing their seatbelt, make it evident and try to help them kick a bad habit. I'm sure death will appreciate having one less soul to collect today.
We can do better and create better by taking responsibilty and helping each other as well as death, by knowing there's no harm in throwing the "let me mind my business" mentality out the window and adapting the "let me help in the slightest" attitude. I remember reading Niyi Osudare's poem "Not my business" as a teenager and I learned if you sit back watching destruction unfold around you and you ignore its presence as it spreads because you think or feel that it's not your business to speak or act on then it will one day become your business when you least expect it. MAKE A CHANGE NOW! TAKE RESPONSIBILITY!
